Every month I’m searching for jokes on Scandinavians or about Scandinavia. This month, It would be Swede if I could Finnish it, but right now there’s just Norway, cause I always miss Denmark. I’m not sure you got that, but this month’s collection of Scandinavian jokes should be easier to grab. Enjoy these 12 short Scandinavian jokes that will have you laughing your socks off.
A Swede was walking down the street with a duck under his arm.
“Where did you find that money?” asked the fellow pedestrian.
“It happens to be a duck.” claimed the Swede.
“Shut up, Swede! I am talking to the duck.”
Ole (Norwegian) and Sven (Swedish) went on a fishing trip to Canada and come back with only three fish.
Ole says, “The way I figger it, Sven, each of them fish cost us $400.
Well, at dat price it’s a good ting we didn’t catch any more of em than we did,” says Sven.
Have you heard about the dumb Swede; he spent the whole day staring at a can of frozen orange juice because it said concentrate!
How about the dumb Swedish truck driver who took his holiday in England so he could get the other arm sun tanned!
A Swede and a Dane were sitting on a park bench smoking a cigarette.
It started raining and then the Swede pulled out a condom and covered his cigarette so he could continue smoking.
Now the Dane was wondering what it was because his cigarette was drenched and he couldn’t smoke it anymore. He asked the Swede what it was and where he could get some.
“They’re called condoms, and you can get them in that pharmacy over there.”
The Dane went off to the pharmacy and asked for some condoms.
The pharmacist asked him what size he would like. The Dane thought for a while and then replied: “Ones that fit on a Camel.”
A Norwegian went to a museum. The tour guide was explaining: “This sword is over 2500 years old.” The Norwegian paused for a second to think about it and then asked: “How is that possible? We are only in the year 2022.”
The Danish man had a problem. His wife was coming home on the train but he could not remember if she was coming at 8:40 or 4:80
Question: What’s the difference between Swedes and mosquitoes?
Answer: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer.
12 Short Scandinavian Jokes That Will Have You Laughing Your Socks Off compiled by Tor Kjolberg